Put that cheese burger down

Imagine this: you’re juggling flaming chainsaws while riding a unicycle on a tightrope. Impressive, right? Now imagine doing it all with the nagging feeling that, deep down, you’d rather be under a blanket, silently judging everyone who eats a donut in your vicinity. That, my friends, is the delightful paradox of high-functioning depression.

Smiling on the Outside, Screaming on the Inside

High-functioning depression (often called “smiling depression”) is a sneaky little rascal. It doesn’t stop you from achieving things. You get that promotion, bake award-winning pies, and even manage to socialise without bursting into tears (most of the time). But beneath the veneer of “adulting like a boss,” there’s a low-grade symphony of “ugh” playing on repeat.

So what does it feel like?

• Like your brain is permanently set to low-battery mode. Everything takes a little more effort, from getting out of bed to, you know, basic happiness.
• The joy lightbulb keeps flickering. You can still experience happy moments, but they come with a side of cynicism or a voice in your head whispering, “This won’t last.”
• The Land of Perpetual To-Do Lists. You might be a productivity machine, but it’s fueled by anxiety and a looming sense of impending doom if you don’t conquer that never-ending list.
• Master of Disguise. You’ve perfected the art of the fake smile and the “I’m totally fine” response, even when your spirit is wearing pajamas made of existential dread.

Why is it so sneaky?

Because unlike its more obvious cousin, major depressive disorder, high-functioning depression allows you to appear put-together. This can be a blessing and a curse. On the plus side, you might avoid stigma or worry about disappointing people. On the down side, it can be isolating and make it hard to ask for help.

But here’s the thing: Help exists!

Even super-powered unicycle-wielding chainsaw jugglers need a break sometimes. Here are a few tips:

• Talk about it. Bottling things up is a recipe for disaster. Find a trusted friend, family member, or therapist to confide in.
• Be kind to yourself. You wouldn’t yell at a friend for feeling down, so ditch the inner critic.
• Small steps, big wins. Start with manageable goals and celebrate your victories, no matter how small.
• Self-care isn’t selfish. Take a bubble bath, read that trashy novel, or do whatever makes your soul sing (as long as it doesn’t involve actual chainsaws).

Remember, high-functioning depression is real, and it’s okay to not be okay all the time. Embrace the unicycle, ditch the flaming chainsaws (safety first!), and know that you are strong, capable, and deserving of happiness. Even if it takes a little extra effort to find it sometimes.

P.S. If you’re reading this and thinking, “Hey, that sounds exactly like me!” – high five! You’re not alone. And hey, maybe someday we can start a high-functioning depression club where we commiserate and bake award-winning pies in our pajamas. Just a thought